Sexual orientation of the geeks

Given the claim i had made in the last post, i am bound to write this one, but then given the self acclaimed modernist that i am, i might not.

For some odd reason, TBBT sex scenes are coming back to my mind. Is geeky sex the same? Or do they take advice from "Sex for dummies"? Do they think they are the Holmes or the Siffredi's of moves and their lovers will have responses like the grey's and the jameson's? Because geeks don't do anything without studying. They are not wired that way. Not wired to take the chance, calculated risk though they are adept at.

But we were talking about their sexual orientation and not sex. Yes, i am slightly perverted. Relatively, slightly. Sexual orientation is very much straight, though and i plan to keep it that way for most of the nights.

Oh, but the geeks' sexual orientation, right right.

The normal people have grown up drooling over the Matt Damons and the Clooneys, girls these days go bonkers over the Damons and the Deans, men are till stuck on the Jennas and the Sashas, but when in IIT you see iitians moving around, there are no chills down your spine, no goosebumps, no hawa ka chalna or the playing of the violins. No matter how goodlooking the he-iitian is or how adorable the she-iitian is , the spark is missing. Really. Its missing.

I used to wonder, for a lot of time, what is wrong with this place, given how crushes went on in school, and the things one did, the general sexual atmosphere lacked something. It took me a year to figure it out. Roaming around the gray roads of non-arousing objects, i finally figured, iitians are just asexual. There it is. Girls have been handed the rough part of the deal, being labelled as she-males, but apart from being grossly discriminating as most girls feel, concentrating the sexuality on the minority in the nerd heaven is plain ...stupid. In the more broader sense : iitians are just plain asexual.

And now i will state the constraints:

1. This does not mean that there is something wrong with them( down there, for the perverts thinking so).

2. This clearly does not mean, that most of them will not fornicate or procreate( yes, you, the one with the spectacles, chill)

3. This does not affect the chances of you nailing a DU chick, they know the truth, and your chances,though terribly low in the first year, will exponentially increase in the 4th year. They are out of college, and well practically out of jobs, and then the mission : NAIL iitian begins.

4. This does not mean that you are abnormal, though having 1 TB of porn does make you the same.

5. For the girls, it does not mean that you won't feel any thing when he touches your breasts( or whatever scholarly fantasies you have). I know, your hormones have been repressed equally and the first night will be all worth it. (Thats what all of you have been saving for right?)

6. There are a lot of other things which it does not imply, but i am shy to list them.

What it certainly does mean, is...you just aren't sexy enough...not at all!

A typical start to a typical day in a typical iit girl's life :


Class at 9.
Alarm rings 8:30. Snooze.
8:45. Snooze.
8:55 - jump out of the bed, pull on the last night's tshirt, put on slippers, some of us grab the toothbrush and bother to brush, the rest rush to the mess for that glass of milk and two slices of raw white bread and watery jam and then jog to the class.

Classes cannot be missed at any cost. The notorious reputation that we have for attending lectures, has a reason, what do you do alone in a hostel of 101 odd girls, when everyone is out there, sitting on the first or the last bench and taking notes, alike? We do not have lan gaming : dota, aoe, counter-strike. We do not play corridor football or cricket. We do not watch group porn. And certainly we derive no pleasure in dressing up each other or ourselves, for that fact.

Come morning and an entire herd of the world's most un-pretty girls march to their classes religiously, dressed in the most awful clothes, smelling not like lavender, but of a hundred different odours, most have their spectacles on, others are just hung over from the last night's out where they were high on the enthusiasm to do something for their very glorious hostels.

Do iit girls carry combs in their bags? - No.
Lip gloss ? - No.
Books - Yes
Reports? - Yes
Money? - Yes
Water-bottle ? - Yes
Kajal/ Mascara/ foundation? - are you kidding me?

Most of us wear bras and some don't, for them it doesn't matter anyway. Some even go to the extent of wearing slips on their bras, i wonder what youthful body are they trying to hide.

Does every girl have a little black dress? - Are you kidding me?
Does every girl have a nail polish remover? - Nail polish?
How often do they go for manicures/pedicures/face cleansing? - ha

Given that our mornings do not begin with the facewash and the nights do not end with moisturising our bodies, and that the entire day goes without us rushing to the washroom to comb our hair, or re-apply make-up, i often wonder, what is it that we end up doing in our free time?

Between rushing to classes and the completion of reports, do we indulge in intellectual talks, dressed in our lab coats do we carry out research that will change the world, are we the TBBT's Leslies??? Do we heat our noodles with a EM laser( or whatever)??

Parlours and boys do not consume our time. Split hair and spilled coffee do not bother us. That pimple we can put up with, the assignment deadline we cannot. The sun tan is fine, as long as we make it to the lab on time. Middle age belly, blame the butter in the mess, but we console ourselves with the frequent walks to the institute. Kajal we do not know and waxing we have never heard of, so do you think we are really afraid of the dark circles?

Coming up next : sexual orientation of the geeks.